The Mediation that Almost Changed Me...

Last week I hosted eight Mediations. And that is just too much for me. So much that Mary covered about five of them for me.

One of these mediations I hosted an extremely young new mom, fresh out of rehab. (Dad was appearing by phone, still white knuckling it in rehab).

Mom was a waitress at a local restaurant that I visit about once or twice a year. And I bet you do too.

For the first time in a long time I felt really bad for Mom. Dad is totally uninterested in parenting with her. It will be a long time before she earns much more than a minimum wage job. During the mediation she had some concerns about meeting Dad approximately three hours away from Des Moines for her son to be able to see Dad. She didn't have the money to drive the child that far a few times a month. And Dad, jobless, was hardly paying any support.

And I felt about sick when she pulled out her wallet to pay me for my services. I surely earned in just a few hours what it was going to take her all week to earn.

As she left Mediation that day I swore to myself I was going to become a better tipper. I'm not an awful tipper, I don't think. I mean, I leave at least 15% but never more than 20%. Obviously these people waiting tables aren't doing it because it was their lifetime goal or desire. And for a moment my faith was restored in the human race. I was going to start tipping so generously so these people could drive their kids to see their dad's in rehabs.

So the first opportunity presented itself on Friday. Tommy and I went to a burger place in Des Moines. Its a place where you order at a cash register and go sit down- nobody actually waits on you. But there is a fishbowl on the counter for tips. I contemplated for a moment not tipping at all. I mean, why am I tipping somebody who just rang up my order? They aren't serving me my food, refilling my drink, or cleaning up after I leave. Its not expected that I tip the cashier at the grocery store or gas station.  But I disregarded that and placed the tip in the fish bowl.

As I walked away Tommy said "I'm surprised you put all that money in that bowl."
I paused for a moment: "I think that person needs that money more than me."
Tommy: "So he can go get more earrings tattoos and waste the rest on booze?"
Me: "No, they are going to use it to pay for gas to visit their children."
Tommy: "You're crazy

He was right. I'm not going to do that again...