At Arm's Length and with Oven Mitts On

There is no doubt about it, my parents give great advice.

For example, anytime my mom hears somebody complain about their husband, the response is "They are all the same so you better just stick with the one you got." I have often repeated that to myself my friends. In fact, while having lunch with a friend the other day, listening to my friend complain about her husband, she told me she often repeats my mom's advice.

My dad, well he gives good advice too. The difference between my mom and dad's advice and commentary is more... colorful.

Here are some tidbits he has given lately:

"When you were studying for the bar exam I saw you sweating drops as big as horse turds."

"Oh yah? Well I categorically deny everything."

"You need to deal with them at arm's length and with oven mitts on."

Was I a B$&@H?

After these two conversations this week, I was left wondering "Was I a b$&@h?"

Me: "I am inquiring as to the status of my jewelry repair."
Customer Service Representative. "Oh yes, it was ready for you to pick up the 18th."
Me: "Well I'm not sure why you charged me $15 to ship it if thought I was going to pick it up."
CSR: "We will overnight UPS tonight and refund your shipping charges. Thank you."

Me (On Thursday at 1pm): "When will my dry cleaning be ready?"
Dry Cleaning Place: "Monday after 5pm. Is that okay?"
Me: "I guess that will have to be okay if that is the best you can do."
DCP: "Maybe we can do at 4pm on Monday."
Me: "Don't worry about it."
... Three hours later I check my voicemail and have the following message... "Hi! This is the drycleaning place. I just want you to know your dry cleaning will be ready on Friday after 5pm. Thanks!"

Nine Things...

1. Isn't it so annoying when you have a blog that you just love reading, and the writer fails to post for weeks!?! Ugh... and story of my blog!

2. Emi has been sick since last Sunday. I have brought her to the doctor twice. Which has resulted in two temperature readings, a few swings at the doctor,  and me getting yelled out by the doctor for not giving Emi a flu shot because she more than likely had the flu.

3. Emi did not have the flu. And it took everything I had not to yell at the doctor for sticking that q-tip up my kid's nose for no reason.

4. Emi turns 2 on Monday! Crazy, right?!

5. One of my biggest pet peeves is people announcing to groups of people a concept that they don't understand and certainly do not apply to their life. Ugh... Some people are SO annoying.

6. If I could do it over again, I would either be a stay-at-home mom, urgent care doctor or teacher. But really I only want to be a doctor when I feel broke or a teacher when it is summer. So I probably would be a stay-at-home mom.

7. I'm kind of surprised that I never became a county attorney. Never even tried.

8. I wish I'd get to writing my book already. That's the ticket to retirement! You're never too young to plan!

9. I've been feeling seriously old lately. People guess me for years beyond my age. I don't love it.

Potty Training....

As I mentioned earlier, I have started working on potty training with Emi. So far that consists of making her sit on the potty every morning that she gets up with a dry diaper. She goes most mornings. Here are the conversations that usually follow:


Me: "Are you all done, Emi?"
Emi: "All done!" She stands up, looks in the toilet and says either one of the following... "Yuck!" or "Yellow!"

My mom calls the move from "yuck" to "yellow" progress...

Nine Things...

1. The primary reason I did not put up outdoor Christmas lights because of my fear that they would still be up in the middle of January. Apparently this is something none of my neighbors care about..

2. Emi rolled her eyes at me yesterday for the first time. (It was over a discussion of going poop in the potty).

3. Speaking of pooping- I have started getting Emi interested in potty training. And yesterday, she pooped for the very first time in the potty bathtub! Ugh....

4. I loved my husband the most this week when he discovered the poop in the bathtub, and without hesitation, scooped it right out.

5. Today I asked Tommy if we should get Emi a full sized bed since there is no room in her toddler bed with everything she wants to take to bed to her. He responded "You could just tell her 'no'."

6. I hate my job but I generally like being an attorney.

7. Tommy got an Apple TV for Christmas. (Not like an actual tv, but the device- google it if still don't get it) and it might be the best thing ever.

8. Speaking of Apple, it is amazing how much Emi doesn't use her ipad after she got a table and chair for Christmas a long with some crayons, construction paper, playdough and some stickers. Or maybe it is because Tommy is always using it playing Candy Crush.

9. Have you gotten a new recyclable cup from Starbucks? It's the little things....

Nine Things...

1. The most annoying thing in the whole wide world is a smoke alarm with a low battery. When we moved into our home about 40 months ago, nearly all our smoke alarms needed new batteries. And now, 40 months later, about every other day one needs a new battery. And the beeping starts at about 3am each time.

2. Today Emi said to me "Mommy, I want chocolate!"  Huh!?! It is amazing the words she picks up that I have no recollection of saying to her.

3. We lost power for about 2 hours tonight. We tried to stick it out at our house, but that lasted all of 20 minutes. Too dark, too quiet, too cold...

4. The second most annoying thing in the world is those little ghosts on Candy Crush Saga.

5. I found out today that I cannot think while in a clustered-filled room.

6. Sometimes it still feels odd when I get a text from my dad. This is the guy that just a few years ago told me "I dont have conversations over email." And now he has conversations in 40 characters or less!
Do you think he'll ever tweet? Do you Tweet? I don't....

7. I wish I tweeted so I could be trendy.

8. I'm currently saving up my Christmas and Anniversary credits for a new purse. No word yet on how many more credits I need or whether I'll be able to buy it for my birthday. Come to think of it. I don't think I bought anything for my last birthday- and that ended with a zero- which earned me double credits. Perhaps I do have enough credits to buy it! #frugal

9. Gotta go.... New episode of Sister Wives is on!

Happy Aniversary!

On December 30, Tommy and I celebrated the successful completion of our 5th year of marriage!

Tommy surprised me with these beautiful flowers:

The note read in part "...  you are an awesome wife and even better mom..." Which I decided to take as a compliment, but also responded with "Well, I'd pick being a mom over being a wife so..." This sparked quite the conversation at work in which all the other moms decided they just couldn't possibly decide whether they would pick their kids or their husband if they had to choose. Are you kidding me? To me, it is a very obvious answer: if you have to pick whether you have your child the rest of your life or your husband- of course you pick your child! I mean, do people really go the hospital during child birth and say "In case of an emergency pick my wife over my kid." No way! And think- they don't even know the kid at that point. Anyway... I told that story later to Tommy and he said "Well, if they all had Emi has their kids they would pick her too!" Love him!

Tommy and I had dinner at our special restaurant- PF Changs. It became our special restaurant on Valentine's Day 2005 when Tommy and I were going to Houston's, our favorite restaurant. When there was a three hour wait- we opted for PF Changs to go, and ever since we eat there usually every Valentine's Day and an occasional anniversary. (Though Houston's is still our preference!)

Here are a few oldie but goodies of us circa 2003 -2005 (Yes, we've been together since 2003!)

I decided to do an Anniversary Quiz:

1. What is the best part about being married?
Tommy's Answer: You get to share your life with the person you love and make great memories.
Dawn's Answer: You get to co-mingle bank accounts so what is yours is mine and what is mine is mine.

2. What is your favorite memory of us?
Tommy's Answer: All the roadtrips we take.
Dawn's Answer: Anything that involves Emi. Oh, and the roadtrips.

3. How many kids did you want to have before we got married and how many do you want to have now?
Tommy: 4 - 4
Dawn: 3 - 3

4. What is the other person's best quality?
Tommy's Answer:: There are too many to name... but most caring.
Dawn's Answer:  Biggest heart I have ever seen

5. What is the other person's worst quality?
Tommy's Answer: Indecisiveness
Dawn's Answer: Biggest heart I have ever seen.

Excited for the next five years!

Merry Christmas

It has been a busy few weeks around here. Besides a few Christmas and New Years celebrations, Tommy and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary!

We had an amazing time at the Van Wijk Winery for the Van Wyk Family Christmas. My aunt and uncle bought an old Church in Sully, Iowa, and have transformed it into a winery. It is beautiful!

Emi enjoyed playing with all her cousins!

Thanks to my cousin, Sheila, for reading the Christmas Story!

My lovely Aunts! People say my Aunt Julie (in the middle) is my twin!

We had a fun White Elephant/Bingo game. You guys, my cousin, Christi, got the worst gifts! There weren't even that many bad gifts, but if there were, she got it! It is so amazing that she continued to open gifts instead of exchanging out for better ones. By the way, I'm enjoying my Bath and Body Works Candle and candle holder and Emi loves her coloring books. (On a side, the other day Emi opened the coloring book and said "I see Elmo" which is weird since we have never watched Seasame Street. #daycare

Emi couldn't resist a picture with her BFF Rylee.

 And the gorgeous tree at the winery. (I seriously need to organize a get together with my girlfriends at this place!)


On Christmas Day my family came over to my house. My mom has spent years stitching these Christmas Stockings for the kids.

They are so impressive. She has another one started, but my sister swears she isn't having any more kids!

The kids enjoyed there presents:

Merry Christmas to all!