February 3, 2012

(Note: You may find this blog long and boring, but I wanted to document everything from the day she was born so I could remember it later! I'll post some more interesting and entertaining blogs that you may want to skip to).

On February 2, 2012, I had been having contractions all day long. While they were mild and about 15 minutes apart, I knew BGT was well on her way. All through the day I kept telling Tommy I was going to be having her soon. Tommy's mom arrived in Des Moines on February 2 in the evening. We went out to dinner with my family. I noticed during dinner that the contractions were getting closer and closer. I told Tommy, but I think he thought that because I had been saying it so long that it was reallly going to be awhile yet (maybe this is where a What to Expect: Daddy's Version would have been useful). Silvia (Tommy's Mom) had already taken a good look at me and decided that the baby was not low enough to be born anytime soon. In fact, we made a bet. I bet that the baby wouldbe here by the 5th- she said the 10th.

We Tommy went to bed around 11pm. I could not sleep. I had downloaded the contraction timer on my phone and was keeping track of the time between contractions. A little past midnight the contractions were now down to about 9 minutes apart. Then, at around 2am, they were about 6 minutes apart. They had also been increasing in strength. I figured if they had progressed that quickly in two hours it was time to go to the hospital. I called the doctor's office, and they agreed and told me to go to the hospital.

I woke up Tommy and told him it was time to go. I had already showered and finished throwing the last things together into my hospital bag. At some point in the evening, there must have been a conversation between Tommy and his mom that I would not be having this baby because he did not want to take me to the hospital. I cant remember if I told him that I would drive myself then or he just decided that maybe I actually knew what was going on when he complied. As I grabbed my hospital bag for Tommy to carry to the car his mom informed me I did not need the bag because I would be coming back home. Using my advanced degree, I decided that we would take the bag along, and if we did come back home still pregnant we could bring the bag back with us.

We got to the hospital a little before 3am. They checked us into triage. There they monitored my contractions and performed a Non Stress Test on BGT. They also checked to see how far I was dilated- just a 4 ( I was a 3 the week prior). Ironically, a few days before I went into labor, my friend, Katie, and I had discussed her labor experiencing and how she went to the hospital two times prior to giving birth. In my head I was so shocked to hear that somebody as bright as Katie would not know when she was in labor. Well, I learned that I might soon be eating those words. As they measured my contractions they started to decrease in time and severity. Don't get me wrong- I was still in at least what I thought was a considerable amount of pain. I kept thinking to myself- there is no way they would send me home when I'm in this much pain, right? They suggested that I walk around the hospital for an hour or so and then they would measure me again and decide what to do.

Before I could walk around the hospital BGT had to pass her test. To pass the Non Stress Test, BGT had to increase her heart rate up 15 beats for 15 consecutive beats (Her resting heart rate ws 145 so for 15 beats she needed to measure 160 or above within 90 minutes). Usually babies do this within 30 minuntes. The nurse tried everything to get her heart rate up. She gave me juice and zapped BGT with a stun gun, but nothing did the trick. A few times BGT got close but never succeeded. The nurse spoke with the Doctor (Doctor Erin Lehman "Dr. Erin") who decided that becaues I was 39 weeks and 6 days, it was better to admit me and have the baby than to send me home.

I was admitted into the hospital at about 6am. I was assigned to a nurse, Ashley, would I had no idea would be sticking with BGT and I through delivery. She actually had no idea either- informing me early in the morning that she was off at 3pm, but would come visit me and the baby the next day since I will not have her by 3pm. At 630am they broke my water.  They told me they would monitor my contractions and decide whether I would need pitocin. At 930am they administered pitocin. Everything went downhill from there. The pitocin speeds up labor and is used to induce mother's into active labor. And that it did. However, by 1130am I was still only dilated to 5. When Dr. Lehman broke my water at 630am she had told me I could have an epidural at anytime. I was surprised that she had mentioned that so early. By 1130, I couldn't take it any longer. I told Ashley I was ready for my epidural. She acted surprised that I wanted it so early. Honestly, it was the best decision I ever made.

I remember as I was sitting there waiting for the doctor to administer the epidural, he was going through a list of things that could result from the epidural- including paralysis. I also remember at the time thinking that any of the side effects of the epidural would beat going throguh another minute of this labor. I must say that I cannot believe that moms do this without an epidural. The pain was so signifcant that I thought for sure I would never have another child again.

While the pain subsided after the epidural I shook so bad after that. I remember just laying on the bed shaking uncontrollably. I kept thinking that surely this was not right, but Ashley and the doctor did not seem concerned at all. I felt hot and cold at the same time. It was pretty miserable. Ashley told me to tell her when the urge to push was so strong that I could not resist it any longer. I told her immediately. She checked and I was alread dilated to 8 at about 1pm and by 120pm I started pushing. I also remember asking each nurse that walked in whether they were concerned about BGT not passing her Non Stress Test and whether everything was okay. Everybody told me that she was fine, but I was so worried about her.

Now I was under the impression that pushing would take hours. Maybe this was the best misconception that I had about labor. Ashley called Dr. Bingaman (Dr. Amy) and told her I was ready for her. Unforteunately, Dr. Amy had overestimated the amount of time that she had to do a circumcision down the hallway. I could overhear her on the phone with Ashley stating "I thought she was only at an 8!"

I dont remember what time Dr. Bingaman got into the room. I just remember that she sat down and was ready to have me push but then suddenly realized she didn't have any booties over her tennis shoes. All I could think is "Lady, I'll buy you a new pair of shoes just get this baby out of me!" Unforteunately, with me shaking so bad I could not really speak. I was able to manage one word during the pushing phase. Apparently when moms get the baby's head half way pushed out they have the option to feel the child's head. I remember Dr. Amy asking me if I wanted to touch her head. What I thought was "Are you kidding me?! Get her out! Why waste time touching her? I'll hold her when she is out." What I said was "No!" I remember all the nurses and Tommy laughing in shock that I had denied the request. I also felt guilty then that I didn't want to touch her head. At 154pm on February 3 BGT was born. She weighed 7 pounds 13 ounzes and was 20 and 1/4 inches long.

Right away they handed BGT to me. These were the thoughts I had running through my head:
- Wow, this baby has a lot of hair. I'm surprised I didn't have heart burn.
- Oh no! This baby does not look like an Emme Kay. I'll wait to see what Tommy says.
- Is she okay? Shouldn't she be crying more?
- Thank God that is over.

I yelled to one of the nurses- shouldn't she be crying more? The nurse immediately reached down to BGT and irritated her to get her to cry more. After a few minutes they took BGT from me and checked her out. Girl got a 9 on her APGAR score. So proud! It just so happened that the pediatrician was available immediately to see BGT so Tommy cut her cord and took her to see the Doctor. At some point during the day BGT's cord detached from the placenta. The cord was also loosly wrapped around her neck. Nothing serious- but I was glad that I had gone to the hospital and that they induced labor.

Once the excitement of labor was over the pressure was on to name BGT. I was so certain in the weeks leading up to her birth that she would be Emme Kay. I became somewhat concerned when I looked at her and it didn't seem like her name. I kept quiet waiting for Tommy's suggestion. I ran through the other names in my head- but none of them seemed to fit her either. Thankfully Tommy's mom had done some research and come up with some names that we should name her- including Ayako or Risa. She hates the name Emme. Tommy and I strongly considered the name Maia (pronounced Maya) which to do this day I still like, but I could not name her something I had just heard of. It did not seem to fit her either.

BGT would remain that- BGT for a few more days until we decided what to name her. The next two days at the hospital were pretty uneventful.  BGT proved to be very easy going. I struggled a little bit breast feeding, but have learned with some patience we both get through it. BGT would hardly cry. She would just chatter a bit. In fact, she soon became the most popular in the nursery at the hospital. During the day I kept her in the room with me. The most difficult thing about breast feeding is the feeding every 2-3 hours for the first few weeks. I hate having to wake her up to feed when she is so peaceful. In fact, at one point, I had not fed her for 4 hours because she was resting so easy. I was then promptly bitched out reminded by a nurse that I could not go that long. I was mindful the second night at woke up just minutes before expecting them to roll BGT in for a feeding. I waited and waited and waited. Finally after about 5 hours since her last feeding I made my way to the nursery. There were all the babies laying peacfully in their cribs and BGT's crib was empty! I banged on the nursery door to see all the nurses standing around in a circle chatting and one of the nurses holding BGT. Apparently while BGT looks nothing like me she has many of my personality traits including loving a good chat session with the girls. However, remembering how the nurse made me feel so guilty about letting BGT go 4 hours without feeding, I bitched reminded the nurses that BGT hadn't eaten for 5 hours and just because she was so easy going and not fussy they still had an obgliation to check her chart! BGT would not return to the nursery! (In defense of the nurses- possibly they were holding BGT because they were so concerned that so much time had gone by and she was still not named!).

While we were ready to go home on Sunday, I was nervous because that meant the deadline had come to name BGT. I waited for Tommy to bring it up. I had thought and thought and thought about it and had come to the conclusion that she must be Emme Kay because she was nothing else. As I suspected, Tommy was hesitant about naming her Emme because his mom hates the name. However, Tommy agreed her name was definately Emme. We talked about it a little longer and Tommy said that we needed to spell her name "Emi." Of course! (Note: Tommy's mom also hates the name "Emi"). Why hadn't I thought of it sooner? She was totally an "Emi" but not an "Emme." Now... for the middle name. I employed a technique I invented in law school when my friends and I could not decide where to eat. We would each suggest a restaurant and one of us would suggest two. Then we would go around the room each person crossing off a restaurant until there was only one left- and that was where we would go. So Tommy and I came up with this list:

- Emi Marie
- Emi Sofia
- Emi Leah
- Emi Ai
- Emi Kay

I crossed off Leah and Ai. I hated Leah and Ai was just Japanese overload. Tommy crossed off Marie and therefore had the choice between Kay and Sofia. He choose Sofia. It is so her. I cant imagine that we would have named her anything else. I'm glad that I was patient in coming up with the right now.

As we headed to the nursery to see the doctor one last time we took notes of the other babies' names. They were: Charlie, Noah, Josiah, Rachel, Levi, Kenzi.... and Maya. Tommy freaked out when he saw the name Maya and said "Oh, I'm so glad we didn't name her that!"

We left the hospital around Noon. As we got into the car Tommy said to me "This is the new me" as he drove the speed limit all the way home while we both freaked out about the way people were driving around us on the interstate (which was probably pretty normal).

I think one of the most amazing things about having a child is that the labor was probably one of the most miserable experiences of my life, yet only a few hours later while I remember how painful and miserable it was- it really doesn't bother me at all- and I would do it again in a heartbeat in another few years.

We have been enjoying our time at home. Emi has been so peaceful and wonderful. She really is a good baby, and we feel so lucky to have her. Every time I hold her I have the same feeling I do when I am on vacation- I never want it to end.

And, in case you were wondering how my three part birthing plan went- well- I deviated from the plan. I did have the epidural. But I also allowed my mom and mother in law in the room. Honestly, I am glad that I did. While I was glad to have my husband in there, it was really really nice to have my mom there too- even if she was answering my phone and sending random text messages from my phone as I laid miserably shaking on the bed.